Why Leaders Feel Lonely

Happy Thursday,

Since 2023 we have been helping leaders physically and mentally bring their A-game to work (and home), with the integration of health and lifestyle coaches into our leadership coaching programs. While we focus on exercise, sleep, and nutrition, there is another theme that keeps surfacing for busy, stressed, and high-functioning leaders: 𝗹𝗼𝗻𝗲𝗹𝗶𝗻𝗲𝘀𝘀 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗶𝘀𝗼𝗹𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻. I’ve seen this derail the most talented leaders. With Mental Health Awareness Week (6-12 October) around the corner, it feels like the right time to stop normalising loneliness as ‘just part of leadership’ and start addressing it. Let’s dive in.

🧠 LEARN something.

‘It’s lonely at the top’ might feel like a cliché, but it is grounded in truth. The numbers are sobering. The 2024 Gallup Workplace Report found that one in five employees feel lonely at work, with the rate even higher for those under 35. In July, a Harvard Business Review study revealed that 70 percent of new CEOs reported loneliness, alongside serious health consequences. Another 2024 study from Rotterdam University linked loneliness among mid-tier managers to feelings of powerlessness and emotional exhaustion. And that is only scratching the surface. But ultimately, all these numbers connect directly or indirectly to low productivity, absenteeism, poor performance and burnout.

The issue often starts with our self-identity and the story we have created for ourselves as leaders. Believe me, after 3,000+ coaching sessions with leaders, I have seen many version of this identity: the lone wolf, the hero carrying the team, the stoic with god-like emotional control, the noble martyr taking it on the chin, the victim shielding the team, the mother hen, or the perpetual ‘no one understands me’ leader. Whatever the archetype, the story results in leaders distancing themselves from their team and other leaders, further isolating themselves and living int heir own head - stressed, unhappy, and feeling isolated. But it goes deeper. Beyond personal identity, loneliness is also a culture issue, reinforced by the unwritten rules and unspoken norms of the workplace. When workloads are high and the culture is “heads down, get it done,” people feel invisible even while surrounded by others. Without trust or psychological safety, connection disappears. If leadership is indeed about unlocking performance in individuals and teams, then this is not a signal you can ignore. As we head into Mental Health Awareness Week, take one step back and ask yourself: is ‘lonely at the top’ a necessity or a convenient choice? Because in today’s busy, high-tempo and fast-paced world, connection rarely happens by accident. It has to be designed.

🤔 REFLECT on an idea.

Jenkins captures the heart of the problem leaders face. You can sit in a crowded office, lead a packed meeting, or scroll through endless Teams chats and still feel deeply isolated. In the modern workplace, what people need is connection, not just connectivity. That is what builds trust, which builds teams and ultimately delivers results.

😊 SMILE a little.

Nothing says “we are connection” at work like being in 37 different group chats, that you never asked for, and you wish you weren’t in.😂

✅DO IT to get results.

If you’re like me (and most busy leaders), you’ll say: “If it’s not in my diary, it won’t happen.” So make it happen – create a No-agenda Meeting. Book a 45-minute coffee or lunch, and commit. Remember, connection happens by design, not chance. Just two rules here: no agenda, and no skipping this meeting until you’ve done at least six. That’s because, in reality, a no-agenda meeting in a busy diary is going to feel awkward, almost unnatural, so you need to stick with it. By the half-dozen mark, you’ll see the value and connection you’ve been missing.

🗓️ What’s your plan for Mental Health Awareness Week?

By the way, what’s your plan for Mental Health Awareness Week at work, 6–12 October? How about delivering a power-hour session on performance-focused mental health, or stress and burnout prevention? Or running a brainstorming session on creating a culture that goes beyond posters and slogans? Reach out and we can share some ideas!

🌱 How we can support you and your team.

We provide strategic leadership solutions tailored to align with your business strategy, size, and budget. We can support your with:

• 1:1 Leadership and Performance Coaching

• Team Coaching, for high performing teams

• 1:1 Health & Lifestyle Coaching for busy stressed leaders.

• Workshops, offsites and team development.

• Or our flagship individual Leadership Coaching Programs.

Kia pai tō wiki

Kenny Bhosale

CEO & Founder, The Bridge Leaders