Decompression

Happy Thursday,

For our final topic of the year, the temptation was to talk about reflection, gratitude or something along those lines. But I’m not going to do that. Instead, I want to talk about what many leaders, me included, are actually feeling right now. Tired. Flat. Hanging out for Christmas. So to finish the year, and stay true to the spirit of this newsletter, let’s look at what’s happening in your brain right now, and a couple of military-style decompression tips to help you shift quickly from work mode to family mode.

🧠 LEARN something.

In the military, after six months or more on a high-stress and demanding operational deployment, you come back pretty wired! Luckily, we’re taught to use deliberate decompression so we can transition from an operational mindset back into normal civilian life. Now I’m not saying the last few months leading up to Christmas are the same as six months on operations in the Middle East. But there are lessons from the military we can absolutely apply in corporate life.

You already know this feeling. Unplugging after a busy period is genuinely hard for many leaders. In the lead-up to Christmas, your brains is running a high-threat, high-achievement script; coupled with chasing the next win and the dopamine hit that comes with it. Simply put, you’re stuck in hypervigilance. That’s a survival mechanism. Of course, all the usual self-care matters. Rest, recovery, exercise, family time, etc. But if you want to transition faster, there are two ideas from the military handbook we don’t talk about much that are worth considering - space and closure.

First is to create a third space. This is a buffer zone between work and holiday. A day or at least half-day spent solo at a quiet spot. Somewhere that is neither the ‘battlefield’ of the office nor the ‘sanctuary’ of home or the beach house. Let dopamine and serotonin find balance, and let your brain process the sock of ‘stopping’ before you fully re-engage with family. The more wired you are, the longer you will need. The second technique is to do a peer debrief. Before you go off-grid, have one final coffee or a phone call with a trusted peer or colleague. Talk through the wins and the stressors of the year. Call it a personal after-action review if you like. Emptying the tank with someone who understands the pressure makes it much easier to switch off the mission mindset. Normally, it takes a few days, sometimes a week, before you really feel you are on a break. But these two simple but deliberate techniques can shorten that gap and help you claim more of your break. If it works for soldiers coming back from the Middle East, it can definitely work for you too.

🤔 REFLECT on an idea.

You aren’t broken, you’re just wired. Your nervous system has been doing exactly what it’s designed to do, but it’s forgotten how to turn off. That too is a skill, and it needs to be practiced deliberately so you can be fully present and actually enjoy a well-earned break with family and friends. You, and they, deserve this.

😊 SMILE a little.

Nothing says “I’m away on leave” like an out-of-office email that explains exactly how reachable you still are 😌

✅ DO IT to get results.

Before you switch on your out-of-office, schedule two things. First, block half a day for a deliberate pause. No meetings. No errands. No “just catching up.” Go somewhere quiet and let your brain stand down. Second, have one final coffee or call with someone. Wins, frustrations, loose ends. Then close the loop. These aren’t nice-to-haves. They’re how you tell your nervous system the mission is over for now, we are moving on.

🌱 How we can support you and your team.

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• 1:1 Leadership and Performance Coaching

• Team Coaching, for high performing teams

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• Or our flagship individual Leadership Coaching Programs.

Kia pai tō wiki

Kenny Bhosale

CEO & Founder, The Bridge Leaders